HEALING, DEALING, DREAMING, AND WAITING

This morning I went to Green Tea Yoga in Salem for a "Conscious Tools for Self Compassion Workshop" with Corey Green McLaughlin, a graduate of the Self- Mastery program and a Certified Spiritual Life Coach through the Holistic Learning Center. A free introduction to a six week process, I connected, strongly, visually, and feelingly--- to a little girl in me, that I have not met face to face before. Her name is "Should" and she's about kindergarten age, absolutely frantic,and though I may want to embrace her to comfort and console her--- she absolutely would not let me!

I've been WAITING--- WAITING for my admission process to complete at the New England
School for Whole Health Education so I can begin studies--- WAITING to hear about the position at Catholic Charities North having had my interview there last week--- WAITING for this evening's Weight Loss Challenge Meeting--- and the Moment of Truth as to whether or not I've lost anything--- WAITING for some medical appointments--- waiting for the snowstorm tomorrow.... And WAITING is not my forte.

I've been researching some complementary and alternative medical and healing therapies, and what, if any, spirituality or metaphysics may be behind them. This is fascinating, and completely absorbing, so I truly do look forward to my studies at NESWHE through the National Institute of Whole Health. I've also been investigating additional options for training, what may be involved and what may be accomplished. So in general, I've been re-membering some of my oldest dreams of "what I want to be when I grow up" and find--- I wanted to be a Nurse, a Missionary--- and looking at how those dreams fared.

Having worked for several years as a Nursing Assistant, I tried to go to Nursing school. By the time I was trying, I was working full time and raising a family; I found it extremely difficult, and the sciences were too difficult for me, I had to repeat them. Finally, in exasperation and surrender to the truth for me--- I never got to nursing school. I did get a degree in Psychology and Paralegal Studies, in addition to two marriages and two divorces.

As to the Missionary, I was always involved in whatever church I was part of, and Missions and Outreach were my main interests. I worked on committees and chaired them, I coordinated and facilitated a Twelve Step ministry and coordinated Project Angel Tree, a Christmas outreach to children of prisoners. As Store Manager for a Salvation Army Thrift Store, I saw my role and the role of the store, for staff and customers, to be a ministry. I went as a client to a faith-based long term program for battered and/or addicted women, and stayed on as staff, doing a little of everything for the cause of this particular ministry. In addition to providing enormous challenges to grow as a person, some of these efforts were truly my most spectacular failures.

So I'm still attracted to healing, and I'm still spiritual--- that should be no surprise. Hence my attraction now to Polarity Therapy and Reiki. Because I am a long-time Christian, and am currently exploring other spiritual paths, I am most attracted to healing modalities that I can perceive as service and as ministry. I have come across the Institute of Spiritual Healing & Aromatherapy, and am looking into their programs in Clinical Aromatherapy and Healing Touch Spiritual Ministry; both claim Judeo-Christian roots.

In the meantime, I am also, slowly but surely, acquainting myself with Herbalife, now that I am a "licensed distributor", and cautiously getting excited about the possibilities opening to me of having a home-based business in the wellness field.

I'm wondering how these can all work together--- perhaps being a healing practioner, a life coach and wellness educator, and a businesswoman.... and I am waiting!